As you read my posts, I’m sure you see me expressing different feelings. Over time, they vary. Some days I’m strong, and other days I am begging for strength.
I waiver between wanting to find the killer RIGHT NOW, and having patience with the process.
There are days I post several thoughts, and days when I can’t even organize a thought to type it.
I’m experiencing grief. Our whole family is. We are going through the stages. Sometimes they are out of sync. One of us might be depressed while others are in denial. Or some of us might be in the bargaining stage, while others are angry.
When I say this, I’m not just talking about our nuclear family. I’m talking about Corey’s entire family. Our household is only the tip of the iceberg as we are the most visible portion. And even with that being said, we’ve made a conscious decision not to involve Corey’s brothers with the media… because they still have their own grief to deal with.
Corey’s (and Justin’s) father lives out of state along with his entire family. In November, they lost their mother (Corey and Justin’s grandmother). So they lost a son/nephew and mom/grandma all in the same year.
Corey’s local cousins (and some across the USA) are also dealing with grief. Some wear his jackets, drive his car, or do something creative to honor his memory. His aunts, uncles, and grandparents on my side are trying to stay strong for my sake… but in truth, they hurt as much as I do.
His friends, and others that were close to him are also dealing with this on a daily basis. I read their posts on Facebook, and I can see their moods swinging constantly.
If you are someone that is facing grief, remember that this is a normal and necessary process for your healing. As you read what I write on this page, you are witnessing the process.
Remember, this process is not always an easy path. It can go from one stage to the next, and then digress very quickly. Sometimes you jump around from step to step. This is still normal.
The only rule in this game is that you must go through it. There is no easy out.
But millions of people have gone through it. They’ve lived through it, and so can we.