Strength of a mother.
The 28th was the mark of 2 1/2 years.
That’s an awfully long time to go without answers. I know there are other mothers that have gone without answers longer. I hear their stories and I wonder how they do it.
Sometimes people ask me how I am able to keep going. They tell me how strong I am. They wonder at my ability to wake up day after day and function.
The truth is I crumbled on the floor the moment I was told Corey was dead.
I wailed that I couldn’t go on… over and over.
My body went limp and I was too weak to move.
And I looked up into Justin’s face…
Into his tear streaked face…
And I realized that at that moment he was not only losing his brother,
He was on the brink of losing me.
And I realized that Josh was still 30 minutes away…
And HE was on the brink of losing me too.
And Bob was with Josh…
He too was on the brink of losing huge chunk of his family…
Because if I let this destroy me,
All of it would be gone.
So I stood up.
Like a MOM.
Not a perfect mom.
There are days I still feel weak.
But when I say I am here for my family,
I really mean it.
Because there was a day,
That one moment
When I could have chosen not to be here.
But who would have taught Corey’s brothers how to live through the worst moment in your life?
If it wasn’t their Mom?